Listening to my subconscious

I'm starting to get some crazy, vivid dreams now, and sometimes I'm not even sure when I wake up whether they were real or not.

I haven't been able to kick the habit of charting my temperature, but since I started having a regular Insomnia Hour (or two) after waking like clockwork between 3 and 3:30am, I've started taking my temperature when I wake for the Insomnia Hour rather than when I wake for the morning (which is a little more erratic, and very seldom preceded by a full three hours' sleep).

So on Wednesday night, I reached out sleepily at about 3:15am, stuck the thermometer in my mouth, had a quick look and noted with satisfaction that my temperature was still higher than it's ever been at this stage in my cycle.

During Insomnia Hour, I worried that it might have been artificially raised because I'd been sweating profusely when I woke up and it might just have been a temporary hot flush caused by the Cyclogest. So at some point, I fell back to sleep, then woke up again a couple of hours later, took my temperature again and was crushed to see that it had fallen by 0.3 degrees C.

Except... I didn't. I worried during Insomnia Hour, then I fell back to sleep and slept peacefully (or maybe not so peacefully - certainly not dreamlessly) until morning - when I turned the thermometer back on and saw that it was still displaying the 3:15am temperature. The second reading was just a dream.

Then on Thursday night I had two separate dreams. In the first one, I had gone away somewhere for a three-day conference. I arrived there to find I'd forgotten to pack my Cyclogest, and ran up and down the corridor trying to find menopausal women on HRT who might be able to give me a bit of progesterone, all the while panicking that if I missed a single dose I would have a miscarriage. (Yeah, let's wait until we've had a positive pregnancy test before we start worrying about miscarriage - one step at a time, PLEASE!)

In the second, time had obviously marched on a bit and I was complaining to DH that with the extra laundry we were doing for the twins and the fact that the towel rail in the bathroom will only hold a maximum of four towels, I really thought it was time he got over his insistence on using two massive bath sheets after every shower - even when he hasn't washed his hair - so that we could have enough room for both the twins' towels on the towel rail.

I think my subconscious has allowed a bit of hope to creep in here somewhere between Wednesday and Friday. I'm quite excited to see what the next instalment will be - perhaps tonight the twins will be starting school, then by the time the two week wait is drawing to a close, they should at the very least be graduating from medical school, or getting a Nobel prize or something...